Sunday, April 28, 2013


Image found here. Thank you, Bill Watterson, for creating this fantastic cartoon strip. Hmmm. I hadn't noticed the remarkable similarities to Calvin in my own children before.....

I've spent the past few days feeling pretty smug.

I should know by now that any form of Julia smugness equates to the appearance of an enormous comeuppance. And, true to form, it did. After sashaying around the pool and locker room and running errands in the sunshine and inwardly gloating to myself about it all this week, today I find myself spending far more time than I'd like horizontal.

Two steps step back......two steps......?

If I don't behave myself and listen to what this old body is telling me which is to just put myself in bed for some serious rest, I'll be taking two and three and four steps backwards. Dang. I have things to do and places to go and people to see.

The thing about this little exercise tit for tat is that I don't know what the rules are -- except for the cardinal one that says, "pride goeth before a fall." That's a constant.


This feels like playing some kind of game for high stakes, but having no clue how to play it. Games without rules are SO NOT FAIR. I feel as though I've been dropped into of one of my favorite comic strips of all time: Calvin and Hobbes. C and H play Calvinball frequently, and here's the (un)rules:

The only consistent rule states that Calvinball may never be played with the same rules twice. Scoring is also arbitrary, with Hobbes at times reporting scores of "Q to 12" and "oogy to boogy". The only recognizable sports Calvinball resembles are the ones it emulates (i.e., a cross between croquet, polo, badminton, capture the flag, and volleyball.) Equipment includes a volleyball (the eponymous "Calvinball"), a croquet set, a badminton set, assorted flags, bags, signs, a hobby horse, and enigmatic and never-pictured "time-fracture wickets". Other things appear as needed, such as a bucket of ice-cold water, a water balloon, and various songs and poetry. Players also wear masks resembling blindfolds with holes for the eyes. When Rosalyn asks Calvin the reason for the requirement, Calvin responds, "Sorry, no one's allowed to question the masks." When asked how to play, Watterson states, "It's pretty simple: you make up the rules as you go."

Although I haven't the foggiest notion what's going on, I have the sinking sensation that I'm not winning this match. Hey! Mr. Watterson? Calvin? HOBBS?!?

When is MY turn to make up the rules?


Anonymous said...

Happy to massage that for you Sweetie.


Julia Oleinik said...

Babe. I'll bet you meant to put that on yesterday's post. But I'll TAkE it. Regardless.