Sunday, May 15, 2011

Calorie Chaos

My friend Susan and I were attending our weekly Weight Watchers meeting yesterday. Susan has lost a whopping twenty two pounds so far! Yay, Susan!

And I have lost..........well, NOT twenty two pounds.

The topic of discussion this morning was "how to deal with people who may side track your weight loss efforts". As the group was talking about this and identifying those sorts of people that are just impossible to have around when one is trying to eat more healthily, they identified people with these traits:

  • Those that are naturally thin and just really aren't interested in chubby people's problems with food,
  • Those that have some kind of agenda which includes hanging around people who are fatter than they are,
  • Those that should be on a diet but just don't want to be and thus don't want anyone else dieting either,

At this point I was nodding along enthusiastically. For shame. The nerve of some people. Gosh, if they only knew what terrible people they are. And then I heard this one:

  • Those that are on a diet but when they decide to jump ship they decide to take the whole shipload of people with them.

I thought about this and then slid a little lower in my seat as I recalled all those times that I forcibly fed dinner guests towering chocolate cakes, miles of pies, and acres of cookies. When I pouted and pushed and complained until everyone within a two mile radius of our feast had consumed at least half of what I had. Because if I'm going to eat a truckload of calories, by golly, everyone else is too. So there. So pour yourselves a cup of coffee and keep up with me here, people.

I couldn't focus on the rest of the conversation because my thoughts were churning. How could I have been so judgmental? And so guilty? Yikes. I finally had to raise my hand and confess.

Hi! I'm Julia. And I'm one of those terrible people that you just described!

I hung my head in shame, as everyone in the meeting began to laugh uproariously. I'll bet half of the members there admitted that they were as guilty as I was.

Ms. Perky Skinny Weight Watchers leader stood helplessly in front of us all as we guffawed and snickered and started sharing bad dieter stories and then began salivating as we were describing the high calorie and delectable foods that we not only indulged in ourselves but forced others to eat along with us. The meeting dissolved into chaos.

Yes. All of the Weight Watchers members were completely and totally out of control. And it was all my fault.

Ahh. One of my finer moments, I must say.

I wonder why I'm just not losing much weight on this diet?

Image of and recipe for Paula Deen's Chocolate Layer Cake found here.

1 comment:

Jenny P said...

LOL I can't believe you destroyed an entire weight watchers meeting!!!

...oh wait, yeah, I can:)

Times like these I'm glad I see you as the me of the future - I only hope I cause as much havoc with my overactive imagination someday.