Thursday, June 12, 2014

Blue Isn't So Bad

Well. Another day, another milestone reached in my journey to getting a realistic perspective on my disease.  Today, I turned in my red temporary handicapped parking hang tag for the blue one.

The permanent one.

I have to admit that when the DMV clerk slid that piece of blue plastic over the counter for me, I hesitated before picking it up. I had been driving around for the last six months with the bright red temporary tucked into my purse pocket. Every time I took it out and hung it from the rear view mirror, I told myself, Well. This thing is only temporary. I don't need one of those blue permanent ones. Maybe in six months things will be different. Yeah. In six months I'll probably look back and be amazed that I needed to use handicapped parking at all. In six months....

I know. Denial. Delusion. De - just about anything that indicates a total refusal to face facts.

But the six months ticked away and before I knew it, they were gone. And, gee what a surprise! There had been no miraculous return to impeccable health. In all honesty, I wasn't really expecting it. I knew in my heart that it was time to face facts and just ask Dr. Young Guy to fill out the forms for the dumb stupid blue tag. So I did. And after pausing for just a second, I took that tag and slid it into my purse.

Time to just get on with life. Doesn't matter whether I have a red or a blue tag.


Heda said...

Ahh look on the bright side. You get parking close to the shops. Free parking in pay spots. And you can always pretend the permit belongs to someone else. xo

Sue said...

Look at it this way. The disabled parking spots are usually wider so hopefully no one will park right on top of you. Nothing more annoying than trying to get into the drivers seat from the passenger side. :)

Unknown said...

I look at the blue tag I have the same way-dumb stupid thing. But I sure do appreciate it when coming out of grocery store after an hour and not having to walk too far. It's kind of a love/hate relationship...same with the cane.

Vicki said...

I actually consider my "gimpy" pass, as I like to call it, a blessing since it has made it easier for me to go back to work. I've been off for 3 years with various issues, not just Sjogren's and finally things are stable, under control or in remission - YEAH!!!

I needed to go back to work since I don't have a wonderful hubby or significant other to fall back on. Using public transport just wasn't in the cards - too difficult.

With driving I needed a way to be close to where I work and in the big city (Toronto) that can almost be impossible unless you are willing to pay big bucks for parking. Fortunately right next to the place where I work is a side street with paid street parking. Those with "gimpy" passes get to park for free.

I feel like I'm blessed and I also found a nice contract job for the next 3 months. Will see if it gets renewed. It's a start :-).

Amy Junod said...

I wept a little when reading yesterday's post and felt a heaviness reading today's.

I always appreciate the honesty of your journey that you share with us. You seem to say out loud the things that I might whisper to myself as I'm facing a new Sjogren's challenge.

Each new phase means that this thing is progressing and it takes a whole new level of acceptance. I'm very stubborn so it takes me a while for it to sink in.

When it comes time to face things head on I recall things I've learned from you and my fellow readers and I calm down.

The parking passes are such a blessing so I'm glad that you're using it. Just a trip to the store can be such a struggle. Anything to help keep things easier is a great thing.

Kate S said...

This was not an easy transition for me, either. I resented the need for it. And when I'm having a good day where I can walk the distance, then I park in a regular spot, and do so.

But there sure are days when I need it. Or when I need my partner to drop me off "right in front", and go find parking. So I try to take it graciously, even if I still feel funny about it.

annie said...

I'm sorry you're going through this, but on the other hand there will be benefits for you in terms of parking spots and distance from the door entrances, it will make it easier on you. Somedays, reality sucks.

I don't have this problem as I stopped driving a few years ago. I could not concentrate, was drowsy at the wheel,and so totally brainfogged I did not know where I was going or how I was driving around, so I gave up my license. Now I rely on hubby or public transport, where I've been known to get lost a time or two on one of my brainfogged days.