Thursday, June 7, 2012

I Hate Buttons

Now that we've had some nice weather, my hammock swing is in place, and Mags and Lulu and I spend lots of time there.


Comfy. For all three of us.

The other day, I was wearing pants on which the back pocket had a dumb stupid button. It was one of those metal buttons that have a shaft which makes them protrude a bit. After the girls and I finished our swing session, I slid out of the hammock when.......drat. I was stuck. The dumb stupid button had caught in one of the hammock strings, which was then pulled out by a good foot or so.

After untangling my backside from the swing, I tried to manipulate the string back into the nice fishnet pattern that it originally lived in. After a bit, I thought I had things fixed up rather nicely. It looked normal......kind of.......

But when I sat down for a trial swing, I realized that even though I had rearranged the strings, the swing was NOT perfectly comfy as it had been before. I could feel a tight band of strings across my hinder which was definitely distracting, so I dumped the schnauzers off my lap once again and began pulling and coaxing strings anew.

It's a strange puzzle. The strings are completely intact: nothing broken, no loose ends. They're all loosely woven just as they should be except for the spot where my butt button did it's damage. I hopped back into the swing yet again, this time stretching out in the swing in every configuration that I could think of in the hopes that all my gyrations would even out the weave somehow.

I'm so glad that my neighbor Naomi wasn't out on her deck to witness this. Wasn't particularly pretty or easily explained.

But it's still not right. There's a stretch of tight strings in the worst possible spot.

See?

Wah!! I love my hammock swing! I need my hammock swing! I can't live without my hammock swing!! I want it to be perfectly comfortable like it used to be!!!

Sniff......sniff......OK. Tantrum over.

Any ideas?

2 comments:

Jenny P said...

When you first got it, did it have instructions for prepping the net & placing it? If so, maybe try that again. Similarly, if it's washable, I'd try that. I agree with you that if nothing's broken or visibly loose, it's a matter of getting the strings to realign, as it were. Sorry to hear this, I appreciate your conundrum & think your are perfectly justified in a tantrum!

Omgrrrl said...

Um....this is hilarious. Rather than remove the button or changing your hammock configuration, may I please request that you go through this whole ordeal again and film it? Top prize on America's Funniest Home Videos will get you $15k which is a LOT of flamingos, schnauzer food and anti-inflamitories. ;)

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