Sunday, February 21, 2010

There She Goes Again

I've struggled with my Bratty Inner Child Julia for most of my adult life, and until recently, her tantrum's effects have been limited to me. And, for the most part, I can usually control her by alternating wheedling and lion tamer methods.

However, lately she's been moving into new Bratty territory. She's begun to terrorize others. Case in point: Last night, John and I went out to dinner with a large group of our friends. BICJ had decided this would be an evening jam packed with calories.

BICJ: Mmmmm.....an Italian restaurant tonight......pasta pasta pasta.......warm buttery bread sticks.....isn't it great that now we're on prednisone, we tolerate wheat better? Party on, Julia!
Me: well..........OK.

I'm such a pushover sometimes. And when I gave in, there was no stopping BICJ. I listened helplessly as she promptly began relentlessly bullying the rest of our dinner party: You're only ordering soup and salad? Are you crazy? Here, have some of our appetizers. Have a bread stick, these are especially good today......try this pasta sauce, it's incredible...... 

BICJ really flexed her muscles when it came time for dessert: Attention, everyone! I insist that we all order dessert. What? You're going to split something? No way! Order something so that we all can have a chance to taste it. Well, yes, the serving sizes are enormous but that's OK because you can give us all a bite. You don't like chocolate? Are. You. Crazy?! Isn't anyone ordering carrot cake? How can we have dessert without carrot cake? And a slice of that orange cremesicle cake......looks divine....If you don't choose something I'm ordering it for you. So get on it. My treat. I insist.  

Everyone protested, but eventually gave in. I knew what Bratty Inner Child Julia was up to. She wanted two things: first, to ensure that we weren't alone in feeling bloated and remorseful the next morning, and secondly - to have carrot cake for breakfast.

Run for your lives! She's a real stinker, that one.

Image found here.

1 comment:

annie said...

BICJ is quite a character, no wonder she overpowered you, Julia.I hope you both enjoyed your evening out and savored every morsel of your food. Was there wine involved?

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