My goodness. Image found here.
I was relating all of my recent health bugaboos to my friend Sarah the other day. After reading the long list of gripes, she sent me an email that said, "Lordy, Julia! Bring on the locusts!"
Well. I think they've arrived. I'm thinking that in the biblical reference here to the ten plagues of Egypt , locusts were the eighth misfortune to be inflicted on the Egyptians. Good heavens. I certainly hope that frogs, lice, flies, diseased animals, and storms of fire don't follow anytime soon.
So the swarm brought with it one more thing to add to my stack of complaints.......the most recent is a urinary tract infection. Yay.
Wait. Is a large group of locusts a swarm? Apparently, it is. But I digress.
I'm exaggerating my discomfort, I know. UTIs are easily diagnosed and treated. And I have no problem taking antibiotics whatsoever. But it's just ONE MORE THING.
I think that the universe or God or whatever has decided that I need to learn another one of life's lessons: that I need a healthy dose of humility. Sunday evening as I was getting ready for bed, I despaired over my reflection in the mirror. The lupus lesions are fading extraordinarily slowly, and in the meantime, I'm losing hair on the scalp blotches.
Sigh. I'm disabled, foggy, plus sized, the owner of a bum knee and stenosed spine, limping along with
cranky trochanteric bursae, and I'm getting old. I'm covered in an entirely unattractive crop of red spots which has migrated from my trunk and arms to my neck, face, and now scalp. AND I AM GOING BALD. Well, kind of bald. In small patches. In just a few places. And I have a hammertoe and bunion. Wah. Wah wah wah.
And now my bladder is as cranky as the rest of me.
I can't drown my sorrows in a Butterfinger Blizzard from Dairy Queen, so I'll have to be content with sucking down gallons of water and bending the ears of y'all. Sorry about that.
Ah, well. This too shall pass. Right, guys?
I feel better already.